Attachment Theory
A Look at Current Literature
Bowlby’s Attachment Theory
Bowlby observed childhood attachment behaviors and linked those to behaviors in
adulthood.
Bowlby assumed that attachment is instinctual and evolutionary, in that
separation of infant and parent would threaten baby’s safety.
Parental attachments
Anxious attachment - anxiety, nervousness, fear of parenting role
Compulsive self-reliant – distant, unaffectionate parent
Compulsive caregiver – overly involved parent
National Survey
59% secure; 25% avoidant; 11% anxious; 5% unclassifiable
Developmental psychologists have found similar proportions among infants
(Campos, Barrett, Lamb, Goldsmith, & Stenberg, 1983)
Subsequent studies have found:
Secure adults are more likely to describe warm and trusting parents and family.
Anxious-ambivalent adults recall little parental support.
Avoidant people describe relationships with family members as distrustful and
emotionally distant.
Alternate Models
Anxiety
Those who are vs. are not fearful that their romantic partner will abandon them
Fear of abandonment reflects the person’s internalized feelings of self-worth.
Avoidance
How comfortable people are with closeness and dependency
Believing others are trusting vs. unreliable and rejecting
Fear of Abandonment
Disoriented - characteristics of both of the above
Romantic Relationships
Secure adults are more satisfied with their relationships than others.
Adults are more likely to be happy with their relationship if they have a
partner with a secure attachment style.
Secure adults tend to have partners with similar attachment style.
Why are relationships with secure adults better?
More likely to characterize their current relationship with love, strong
commitment, and large amount of trust
Able to accept and support partner despite his/her faults
More warm and intimate conversations
More likely to share personal information when appropriate
How is this different from avoidant style?
Fear of intimacy
Problems with jealousy
Believe real romance rarely lasts forever, and “head-over-heels” love does not
exist
Less likely to show affection or share intimacy with their partners
43% avoidant undergraduates said they had never been in love.
How is this different from anxious-ambivalent style?
Fall in love many times but have difficulty finding long-term happiness they are
seeking
Afraid of losing partner and give in to his/her wishes to keep him/her happy
More likely to fall in love with someone who does not love them in return
Easily feel threatened
What about Disoriented Style?
Fearful people
See themselves as unworthy of love
Doubt that romantic involvement will provide the much-needed intimacy
Avoid getting close to others because they fear the pain of rejection
Summary
Avoidant and anxious attached adults, just like newborns in original research,
feel heightened stress when separated from partners.
Insecure partners see more conflict in their relationships and become more upset
at perceived “rifts.”
Secure partners seek more support from and offer more to partners; avoidant
partners seek less.
An Optimistic Look
People may be able to change their attachment styles.
A loving and trusting adult relationship may provide that which was denied as a
child.
30% young women in recent study changed attachment style over 2-year span.
Attachment style may not be established as early as previously thought.
Do relationships last because people have good attachment styles, or do people
develop secure attachment styles because their relationships last so long?